Yo, Dudes n' Dudettes!

Just a quick update on the updates!

8000

The garage door? Still almost done

8000

Furnace? Still waiting

8000

And the remodeling? I didn't tell you? You don't wanna go there. A word to the wise... Never remodel the kitchen and bathroom at the same time. It ain't pretty. Why do they say a word to the wise and then go on ahead and give out a sentence or two?

8000

Oh, wait. I'm thinking you wanna know what's new in the store.

Ho baby do we have newz for you!!!

I kinda started writing this on June the 1th. It's now June the 2th and I'm still not really done. But I may just send it anyway. Mebbe not since it's the 4th.

( I got the idea for that last sentence from a Czech newsletter I subscribe to. I can't read a word of Czech, but I like the way they write the oneth and the tooth) (Yes, I'm easily amused) (Ok, it wasn't the "last" sentence, but I was close)

First of all

8000. Yup. Finally broke the 8000 barrier. Something like 8,051 Masonic items for you.

Did I mention Fathers Day is coming?

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Some deja vu...

Coupons? Since some of you are forgetting that there are usually coupons available even when you don't see them on the cafepress site. But if you hit our main page, you'll see we have a new feature that shows coupon(s) you can use. Just pick the one best for you. And, they are re-useable. You can use it on one purchase, then go back later and use it on another purchase. We're easy.
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Ok, back to non deja vu

What else is new...

Hmmm. Oh... 8000. Oh, been there done that. Sorry. That was still kinda deja vuey.

For what it's worth, there are also a ton of custom products you'll never see. If someone wants a custom gift with a proper name on it, it doesn't see the light of day unless they say they want it on the site for all to see. Only the orderer (orderee?) gets the link to it. So if you were worried about someone seeing a gift with their name on it... ain't gonna happen. I usually keep them there and hidden for a month or two then dump them.

No, not the person with their name on something, just the something.

Ok, back to the gnu. Oh, wait, I think that's a goat. Back to the new...

(am I rambling again?)

Umm.... Oh yeah! The Comic Section. When I dream up a wierd idea, (let's not go there) I'm putting them in a new comic section. Mostly for laughs but a few serious things as well. But in a cartoony kind of format. Check it out!
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Oh, before I forget.

Wait... I forgot.

Ooh! Got it!

I get email for custom designs all the time. But every once in a while I email back for some more information and never hear from them again. So if you've ever written to me, I answer everything that has a question to it. If you haven't heard back from me within a day or two, please email me again. I kinda long for the good old days when email was more efficient than snail mail. It just never got lost. Now it gets lost as often as me.

Ok, that wasn't kind of a new thing. It just seemed to get caught up in the middle of the new stuff. Now I'll return you to our regularly scheduled new stuff.
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The Veterans section. Now you'll notice that Vietnam vets and Korean war vets have their own section. And it's about time. I keep tellin' youse guys that I'm kinda old. If someone doesn't kick me now and then with an idea I'd never come up with it on my own. sigh. If you haven't been to the shop in a while, (shame on you!) you'll see the Iraq and Afghanistan vets also have their own section. I'm trying to come up with a WW2 design but kinda drawing a blank. Anyone got any ideas, I'd love to hear em. But, written in email would suffice.
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What else... Oh yeah. Maternity clothes. I'm not much for them myself. I look a little dumpy in them. (I actually look kinda dumpy in anything, but I digress) But I"m sure a few wives out there would like them. Actually a lot of wives out there do like them. Who knew? And there are now plus sizes as well for our ladies. Including OES and Shriners wives too! And Daughters of the Nile and Daughters of Isis and Heroines of Jericho and... well you get the idea.

::::yes dear? Oh, I'm sure they know that the maternity clothes and the plus sizes are two different things.::::

::::Yes, I know it sounded strange::::

:::You're right. They already know I'm strange:::::

Oh, if you're wondering what this rambling here is about, you would probably want to (maybe want isn't the right word) check out my newsletter archive on the website. Just please don't let the authorities know about it. I look even dumpier in a straight jacket.

Which reminds me. I haven't updated that in eons either. I really need more of me. But, the world is not ready yet I suppose.Hmm... rambling again. Please strike that last sentence.

Back to your regularly scheduled updates:
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Kids stuff has more coloured clothing, more coloreds for us too. (See? I'm multi-lingual)

Hey. Has it been that long since my last newsletter? There's a lotta new stuff! Fire, Police, EMT, SWAT sections... Hey, we have sections with sections. Kinda gotta hafta with over 8000 items.
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Ok, that's it. I know I'm forgetting stuff so you gotta go see for yourself. I'm tired. I wanna go home now.

::::Yes dear? Oh... I am home? Oh yeah. That's why you're here. ::::
::::OUCH::::
:::Yes dear. I know they think I'm an idiot::::

sigh
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Whoops. More new stuff. (I'm tired)

The linky stuff

(Yes, that's correct. Linky, not kinky)
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Ok, this is a bold faced plea for help. HALP! See? My Lodge has an ongoing fundraising program for a special little girl. No, not asking for money, just a minute of your time to say hi to her and let her know where you're from. Check her out at... http://gbp.net/valleylodge/docs/steph.html

Why, you ask? Well, isn't that what Masons do? :) Oh, and an email address is required to use the form. We don't track a thing. But any one will do. (You seriously think I'M going to remember something?) You can put blip@blap.com if you want to remain incognito-ish. And yes, I just threw incognito-ish in there for our foreign friends. Bad enough you can't understand most of my english, I have to make it a bit tough for them too! I am an equal opportunity annoyer after all. ;)

:::::whistling nonchalantly::::
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We interrupt your links for a very important message!!!!

VERY IMPORTANT FOR AFFILIATES!!!!!!!

IMPORTANTE. (That's for our Spanish speaking brothers n sisters. Hey, it's all I know!)

The Cafepress program is now officially over. Anyone in the program should have signed up with Commission Junction by now. www.cj.com. If you haven't, you're sending folks to the pages and getting no commissions on their purchases! Not a great way to raise funds! Kinda like fund raising without raising funds.

Affiliates should head for the community section on cafepress and read about the changes. Of course, if you need help just give me a yell.

Since your pid is changing, those of you who have free web sites we put up for you, you'll have to get back to me with your new PID so we can change it for you on those sites!!! If you don't send it to us we won't be submitting your sites to the search engines since it won't make much sense anymore.

And remember, if you didn't tell me you are an affiliate, you're losing something. I regularly submit ALL affliates web pages I know of to all the major search engines. That's free too. So let me know if you are one!

There's some updated instructions on the registered affiliates page. http://www.gbp.net/afilfaqs/
That will give you an idea of how you set them up for those with their own sites. But yell if you have a problem. It's still a bit jumbled. I'm in the midst of updating about 80 sites with the new pid's. Not to mention trying to keep up with the custom order requests coming in nearly every day.

It's not easy being me. :( But, I do like making people happy. (Not slap happy, like me)
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Am I gone yet? No such luck. :( Well, then there's mental section...
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I'm thinkin' I'm finally into deja vuey here...
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Oooh... I put all that stuff above in the middle of the linky section. Oh, well. Shoot me.

Show off your own Lodge on line!!!
http://gbp.net/masonicshop/lodgeworld/

Links to other shops you may enjoy...
http://gbp.net/masonlinks/

rtj's Junqueyard...
http://gbp.net/rtj/ (Unique Masonic coins, dogtags, lapel pins and more. Including Vietnam & Korean Vets coins!)

Really rockin' Masonic Embroidery anyone? Good people that do good work!
THE MASONIC PATCH...
http://gbp.net/masonicpatch/
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Don't forget to check out our wallpaper page. We still add to it once in a while. (and we do take requests)
http://www.gbp.net/valleylodge/graphics/WP/
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Ok, I'm outta here. (Finally) Just wanted to update you on the new disaste... er, changes. In the meantime... Keep it square!

(If you read all this, aren't you glad my newsletters are so far and few between?) And yes, wherever you see "we" here... you can substitute "I" for it. There's only me, myself and I here so "we" may be misleading. Or does me, myself and I equal we?

My head hurts.

S&F

Gary

P.S. I run all this through a spell checker before I send it. I like to see how many red lines there are.

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